Some you may know that my biggest fear is quite possibly going to get my haircut. I hate it. And it’s not due to any sort of Sweeney Todd style fear, no, it’s the simple terror of sitting there helplessly in a chair while a barber (in san francisco, usually an asian woman who doesn’t speak the same brand of english I do) chops off my hair without me knowing how to instruct them at all.
Communication is key, and because I took spanish instead of barber in High School, I don’t speak barber.
I’ve often resorted to having a girlfriend around the time of my hair cuts, and letting them do the talking for me. I figure that if I haven’t done anything too bad in the days leading up to the cut, she would probably have my best interest in mind and, after all, she would be the one looking at my mug every day and hopefully still being attracted to that.
But alas, sometimes (like now) I am single. And sometimes, while single, I am still in need of a haircut (like now).
Well, thanks to the wonders of the interwebs, I have finally searched and found a small lexicon dedicated on how a man should talk to his barber:
http://artofmanliness.com/2010/08/25/get-the-perfect-haircut-how-to-talk-to-your-barber/
It couldn’t have come soon enough, as I’m currently readying myself to walk down to a barber, which often gives me the chills I’m sure are equated to a man on death row taking a walk to the gas chamber.
Now that I’ve successfully offended several readers with that hyperbole, off I go! Wish me luck!
